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About Literature / Hobbyist Member MelissaFemale/United States Recent Activity
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i hate the way my mind has been wired
where all i can do 
when i hear of a situation 
is think 
and think more
and keep thinking 
until i think of the worst possible outcome
and i wonder how easy it might be 
for everyone else 
to not think about those things 
to such an extent; 
but then i question
why was i cursed
with overthinking
when it's the very thing 
that can ruin everything
and tear your life apart. 
i don't want to think
it's that simple
but the simplest things
are always the hardest to reach
i can't help but think
how easy it'd be 
if you could just escape everything
and leave all your thoughts behind. 
because now i have nowhere to go
nowhere to hide from
everything that goes in and out of my brain
i can't stay awake 
or else reality threatens 
to bring out the worst of my worries in things
and i can't sleep
because my dreams are haunted
and are turned into nightmares
by people and memories that are long 
since over with
but part of me holds onto them 
and i don't know why
maybe it's because 
those were the times 
that i felt so alive
and not so worried and scared and sad 
i was happy at one point
but it's gone now
and my brain wants to play cruel tricks 
on the part of me
that can't control it's feelings
It's fall. The leaves are a fading green, with orange, yellow, red and brown spots. 
There's a long road ahead of me, but I don't know where it leads. 
Trees line either side of the leafy path. 
In the distance, between the trees, mountains. 
Overlooks with beautiful scenery. 
Fall is my favorite season. 
I'm alone, though I can't see myself.
The air is crisp and I can smell warm apple cider and pumpkin pie. 
The road is never ending.
I'm just walking forward, never once looking back. 
I stop and take a deep breath, taking in my surroundings. 
I'm happy, I'm calm. 
I continue walking, and I see so many things. 
I'm imagining a perfect world created for me, and only me. 
I don't know how long I'm there, but the sun doesn't seem to be going down. 
It's a never-ending fall evening.
There's small gusts of wind, but I don't really feel them. 
I know I'm wearing a scarf, a beanie, a sweater, jeans and boots, even though I can't see. 
It's mid October, I just know it. 
The road still doesn't stop. 
Carved into trees are words of wisdom, and excerpts of Edgar Allan Poe. 
There's music in the distance, but I can't figure out what it is. 
It's soft, it's piano music. 
It's soothing. 
The walk continues on, but I don't get tired. 
I still smell the cider and the pie. 
My favorite time of year is lasting for ever. 
There's a pumpkin patch and a forest, but I stay on the road. 
I pause once more, seeing the long-stretched road in front of me. 
I sit down on the damp pavement; it recently rained. 
Taking in yet again another deep breath, I lay down in the middle of the road. 
I relax, letting the calm wash over me. 
And somehow, I'm okay with it, even though I know where I am. 
I'll be here forever, my happy place, created just for me. 
Most people won't call acknowledge that they're in heaven, but I do. 
I'm forever in my happy place, where only good feelings are felt. 
Where music is tasted by your ears. 
Serenity is seen. 
Happiness is felt. 
This is my forever. 
This is my happy place. 
happy place
it's been a while since i've mentally gone to my happy place, though i've been asked the question a lot recently: "what is your happy place when you need a break?" well, this is it, this is my happy place. 
i can't say it enough

how much i think about 

how easy it would be 

to not feel 

if there was just a switch

that you could flip 

and you never had to feel pain



ever again 

and how much easier 

life would become 

you could live and not regret anything 

it would be simple 

you could move on 

and do something new 

but the only problem

that i could see 

following this 

would be that we would lose ourselves

and the type of person we really are 

if we didn't feel

so you have to think 

would i rather be someone else 

and never be sad again 

or would i rather keep who i am 

and go through the struggle of life 

wondering when it will all be over ? 
my evening was okay 

i was doing alright 

until the doorbell rang 

and i hated my night 

i tried to forget it 

i tried not to care 

i thought i could ignore it 

but it was still there

the thoughts that linger 

and bring back memories 

you think about everything 

and the angels sing their haunting melodies

you try and put your mind to sleep

and smile as much as you can

but that disguise breaks down 

and you just cry out "damn" 

because the pain that conceals itself 

behind those big doe eyes

just shows how much 

i hate goodbyes 


MelissaTheGinger's Profile Picture
Artist | Hobbyist | Literature
United States
What I do doesn't really matter, since it consists of wading around in the sea of life, constantly poked and prodded at by bigger fish and fishermen. Constantly wondering why it's so big and spacious and why some things are different than others. Why I can't have things that I want because it'll hurt in the end. Who knows? I might be searching one day and find treasure in the wreckage.
I am a mermaid. Any arguments are invalid.

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DraganTheMighty Featured By Owner Apr 29, 2014
Thanks for the fav.
SolidMars Featured By Owner Nov 27, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
thank you kindly for the fav on Along Came an Angel. I'm glad you found my work worth your time :tighthug: 

SCFrankles Featured By Owner Nov 13, 2013  Hobbyist Writer
Thank you so much for faving my SWS ^^ :icongiveflowerplz:
infinitexxx Featured By Owner Sep 4, 2013  Hobbyist General Artist
as you may know, i'm deactivating my account--
please follow me here if you're still interested in keeping up with my poetry/stories! :tighthug:
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Thank you for the favorite! I appreciate your support :)

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Have a wonderful day!
Chihire-stock Featured By Owner Jun 14, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thank you for fave :)
AnnieKaye Featured By Owner May 7, 2013
Thank you for the fave! :D
Felizias Featured By Owner May 7, 2013  Hobbyist Digital Artist
Thanks for the :+fav:. :D
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Thank you so much for the :+fav:! :XD:
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Thank you for the favourite :D :D
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